#it really just depends on what you're looking for!

[starboye]

starring: alexander "konig" kilgore x male reader

request: just thinking about innocent naive reader getting corrupted and not even noticing a single thing because he just want to be a good friend. . .

warnings: smut + angst, yander!konig, kinda obsessive, handjob

konig was such a good friend to you, he would never do anything to hurt such a pretty thing like you and plus you were both best friends so nothing was ever kept a secret between you two, so imagine konigs' face when you announce you have a date with some guy.

watching his face crack into a soft smile and telling you how happy he is for you but behind those eyes he was mad as hell, i mean who does this new guy think he is to try and take you from him, and it gets even worse when you come back from the date the next night and tell konig about how you loved it so much with the biggest smile on your face.

as much as he wants to feel happy for you he just cant imagine anyone else stealing him from you so he makes up a lie "i don't know about him y/n" he blankly making you question him "what do you mean" you ask him "i just have a weird feeling about him" he continues looking at you with the most beautiful eyes "well what if you just get to know him" you try to give an idea but konig pipes up with "you know my gut feeling is usually always right"

and he was kinda right i mean there was that one time you had feeling for this one guy and it turned out he was actually arrested for murder, or at least that's what konig told you (he pulled some strings at the police station and got what he wanted) "well then yeah i guess i can stop seeing him" you say and within seconds konigs arms are wrapped around you and he's thanking you for trusting him.

and queue the constant run of you finding a good guy and konig coercing you to stop seeing them because he has a 'gut feeling' and you trust him, but really he just wants you all to himself, making you depend on him more and more as time goes on by telling you if you ever need help with anything to call him and you do, calling him for even the littlest inconvenience.

whether that be helping you fix something or letting you cry on his shoulder when you get layed of from your job (after he pulled a few more strings and made it seem like you were a bad employee) and offering you a room at his place since you were short on money and couldn't pay your bills.

with you moved in now he can be so much closer to you, sneaking through your things at any chance he could and whats this it seems like you need some new clothes since all yours seem to be gone (he used all of them to jerk off and now they're ruined with his cum) so he takes you to the mall, carrying all your bags as you go to every store getting all the things you want, but hm it seems you need some help trying on those pants why doesn't he help you.

"you sure you're okay with that" you ask him "yeah it's what friends are for" he says helping you but on the jeans that hugged your ass so well, it was no surprise he got a boner, it straining so hard in his pants he just needed some release "fuck baby i need your help" he groans "what's wrong konig" you asked and he moved your hand to the aching bulge in his sweatpants "please just this once" he pleaded and after some consideration you agreed, i mean it was just a one time thing between two friends right.

pulling his pants down his thick cock flops out and you immediately work on fixing it for him, his grip tightening on the top of the dressing room door, your hand rubbing back and forth on his achingly hard boner, this was like his dream, he had thought about this exact thing so much, jerked off to the thought and feel of it but the real things is so much better than he hand.

"fucking shit y/n" he muttered before cumming on your hand, thick load messing up your hand as he let out shuddering breaths, and after that it became a regular thing, konig being all needy and asking you to come help him get off since you did it best (in reality you weren't the best at it but don't worry he'll train you soon enough).

and time after time it seemed you liked it more and more to the enjoyment of konig, maybe just a few more times and you'll tell him how you've had feeling for him to right?

taglist:@mailmango @spermeboy @ghostking4m @gayaristocrat @addictedtomalepits @staarb0y @crispysoup318 @its-ares @gargoylesworld09 @znerac

[watarfallar]

Merry Christmas eve! I bring presents

Grian: Can you PLEASE peer pressure me into doing my project? Scar: Do it or you're straight. Grian: I said peer pressure, NOT THREATEN!

Grian: Damn, the power went out. Scar: Don’t worry, I got this. Scar: shakes rapidly and starts to light up Grian: What-? Scar: I swallowed a glow stick! Grian, on the verge of tears: WHY WOULD YOU-

Scar: Don’t worry, I know exactly what I’m doing. Everything is going to be fine! Grian: How can you still say that? Scar: Because sometimes, when things get tough, denial is all we have.

Grian: When was the last time you cried? Scar: Uh 15 minutes ago, why?? Grian: really? That recent? Scar: Yeah voice crack is that a issue? starts crying again

Grian: I am so cool. I am an absolute Chad. I am the epitome of coolness and awesomeness— Scar: Hi. Grian: melts down in a flustered heap of softness

Grian: Look at me straight in the eyes and tell me the truth, Scar! Scar: You can’t expect me to look into your eyes and be straight.

Scar: I want to be with you for the rest of my life. Grian: Damn, that sounds like a marriage proposal. Scar, getting down on one knee: That's 'cause it is.

Grian: Is five a lot of followers? Scar: Depends on the context. Scar: On Instagram? No, not a lot of followers. Scar: In a dark alley? Yes, a lot of followers.

Scar, confused and exasperated: Grian, how do you plan on telling a bear to go vegan? Grian: Politely.

Scar: That's it, I'm cutting off the internet! Grian: No, please don't! I have a family to feed! Scar: Scar: What? Grian: I need to feed my Neopets!

Scar: Do you want to know your gay name? Grian: My… my gay name? Scar: Yeah, it's your first name- Grian: Haha. Very funny Scar- Scar: gets down on one knee And my last name. Grian: Oh- oh my god.

Grian: Hey guys, I’m making french toast sticks in the oven. I’m gonna take a quick nap, so wake me up in 5 minutes to flip them over. 5 minutes later Scar: Grian it’s been 5 minutes, time to flip your sticks. Grian: snnnzzzz… Scar: GRIAN YOUR STICKS!

Grian: Look, Scar, if you can fit your head down the gun’s barrel, you can assume it doesn’t have a non-lethal setting.

Scar, cowering in fear: What do you want from me?! Grian, standing in front of Scar: bites into the whole KitKat bar like a heathen Scar, crying: Please…stop…

Grian, at Scar: Of course you have blood all over you, and pronouns.

Scar: A banker? Me? Grian: Yes, Scar. Scar: But I don’t know anything about running a bank! Grian: Good. No preconceived ideas. Scar: I’ve robbed banks! Grian: Capital! Just reverse your thinking. The money should be on the inside.

Grian: Smart is attractive. Educate me on something I don't know! Scar: The mouth of a jellyfish is also an anus. Grian: Stop.

Cop: What are your names? Grian: Don't tell them, Scar. Cop, writing: Scar… Grian: Crap. Scar: Nice going, Grian. Cop: Scar: Uh oh.

Grian: Give me everything you’ve got! Scar: All your friends secretly hate you. Grian: Wait, what? Scar: I’ve got anxiety.

Scar: The saying “it is better to beg forgiveness than to ask permission” no longer applies to Grian.

Scar: COMPANY IS COMING! I WANT THIS PLACE LOOKING LIKE DISNEY ON ICE IN ONE MINUTE! Scar: GRIAN IF YOU HAVEN'T MADE YOUR BED THROW IT AWAY IT'S TOO LATE TO MAKE IT NOW! Scar: GET RID OF THE COUCHES, WE CAN'T LET PEOPLE KNOW WE S I T !

Scar is cleaning the house and they find an empty bottle of orange juice Scar: Clear orange juice? Scar: Oh, it's empty. Grian, who has been watching the entire time: I live with an idiot. I live with an idiot. I live with an idiot.

Grian: So we're gathered here today for a very special reason and I think you'll all agree with me here. Grian: And if you don't well then fuck you. Grian: I'm looking at you, Scar, you jealous mop.

Scar: Hey, wanna hear a funny joke? Grian: I only like dark humor. Scar, turning the lights off: What do you call a fake noodle? Grian: Scar: An IMPASTA!

Scar: Do you know the best way to respond to disagreement? Grian: With tears? Scar: No. Grian: tears up

[irrealisms]

hi! yr probably not lookin for asks anymore, but. what's your lifesteal elevator pitch? i know absolutely nothing abt it or any of the folks on the server except the vague things i've absorbed frm reading yr analysis as it crosses my dash, but it compels me, etc.+ also merry christmas! <33 🎄🌟

good news: i am always looking for asks

bad news: my parents DID go to sleep and i was able to wrap presents and put them beneath the tree and so on, so i wasn't going to do more asks tonight

good news again: i actually already have a lifesteal pitch. in a google doc. bc i'm normal

the pitch does assume you're basically already into mcrp and just curious about lifesteal in specific BUT we went to dsmp together so this works out

I really love shitty little tryhards causing problems via impressive feats of minecraft, and lifesteal is full of those. if you like people being good at minecraft, I really recommend lifesteal--in s2, clownpierce was top 50 worldwide at crystal pvp, and now he's washed and in s6 there are 2-3 (depending on who you ask) lifestealers who are better than him at pvp (admittedly maybe not at crystal); in s4, there's some stuff that's impressive in ~vanilla (eg parrot wins a 1v1 while on one heart) and some stuff that's impressive through exploits/social stuff (eg a group of people use a glitch + social engineering to get /op and prove to mojang that the glitch is a security issue that needs patched). every season is like this! lifestealers have backdoored the server 3 seasons in a row (s3-5). for a more recent weird Lifestealer Behavior, rekrap and jumper filled in every end portal room and built new fake ones to make it look like the world glitched and generated without them. lifesteal is weird and constantly coming up with new weird yet impressive things to do. a lot of stuff that's currently banned on lifesteal (F3+A, pie ray) are things i only learned were possible from lifesteal. (on the flip side i'd say: if you are not into shitty little tryhards making weird impressive clickbait, you probably won't like lifesteal, although you may still like hearing about it from time to time.)

related to them being shitty little tryhards causing problems: the rules are...more of a suggestion. getting around the rules, and hiding from the server owner and/or other players that you're doing so, is often part of the fun of lifesteal! (see also the thing where i mentioned that it's been backdoored three seasons in a row.) if that's intriguing: check it out. if not: once again, you have been warned.

lifesteal absolutely has lore and some people roleplay on it, there is nonzero c/cc divide, but it's more like traffic life than, say, late dsmp--it's fully improv, not scripted, and even more than traffic life it is genuinely adversarial. you can sometimes be confident that someone is in character but you can never be sure if someone is out of character, on lifesteal-- things like "going to someone's house irl to turn off their computer" or "lying about your homework/school/sleep schedule" or "changing your entire discord layout so that when you DM someone they think you're someone else" or "claiming you need their footage of an event for your video when actually you just want to see where their spawn point is" are all things that have been done on lifesteal that are considered fair game! everything on lifesteal is real; sometimes this goes well, sometimes it doesn't, but both are interesting to see imo because they are real

partially for this reason and partially for other reasons, lifesteal is fascinating to me as a piece of unique storytelling? a lot of mcyt is doing interesting things with its medium and being improv, lifesteal's not fully unique in that, but definitely if you like that you might like lifesteal. along with the improv, there's the fact that many lifestealers lie about what actually happened in their videos (comparing different videos with the vods, or in some cases with "what people say in various vods" when events weren't streamed, gives some fascinating insights imo--how do people frame their stories? how honest are they? what do they blatantly lie about, what do they gloss over or omit, what do they include in full? who, if anyone, do they see as the heroes or villains? whose videos agree with each other, and whose present a totally different story?), and the fact that conflict about "where do we want the story to go next, what do we think would be an interesting video/the best ending" is often the driving motive for in-character wars and conflicts! if you're interested at all in lifesteal and storytelling, check out barrier blocks part 2 by @mering/@myrmica, which is a deep dive on eclipse federation and the end of lifesteal s4 (those are my special guys); it dips into some academic game studies and it's really, really good. i genuinely cannot recommend it highly enough. (part one is also real good for non-lifesteal-specific discussion of mcrp!)

if you want a more specific plot summary (esp of s4) and/or "how do i actually, like, watch this" (of any seasons): hmu! but that's my pitch. also, read barrier blocks

[wild-blue-wanderlust]

Burn Butcher Burn

(An Analysis of Jaskier’s Breakup Song with Geralt)

With some help from my musician friend, @violetjayb (ily)

I hear you’re alive. How disappointing… / I’ve also survived, no thanks to you

Jaskier has had his life saved by Geralt multiple times throughout the show. His view of Geralt is, and always has been, one of a hero, and this is what he always writes him as. Here is the first indication that Jaskier currently doesn’t see Geralt this way, and is going to make that known.

He’s starting out the song by saying ‘this isn’t the same as the music I usually write for him. He didn’t save me this time.’

The ‘I hear you're alive’ doesn’t actually refer to a specific scene or conversation where he’s informed that Geralt is still alive. Instead, it more speaks to the fact that Jaskier sees Geralt as unkillable, and the fact he still believes this, despite his changed feelings for the man, was interesting to me.

It being ‘disappointing’ is fun. It reminds me of a scene from season one where some dude tells Jaskier that Geralt’s dead and his response is an unbothered ‘eh, he’s fine!’ The idea of Geralt’s death used to be something that Jaskier didn’t take very seriously - because how could Geralt die? But now it disappoints him that he’ll stick around.

There’s also something to be said about how Jaskier may be unable to ‘burn all the memories’ of Geralt like he sings later in the song, and that this is potentially the way in which Geralt is still alive.

Did I not bring you some glee / Mr ‘Oh-Look-At-Me’

While Jaskier and Geralt travelled together, Jaskier would sing and chat and just be in a consistently cheerful mood, which contrasted Geralt’s constant state of quiet moodiness. Here, Jaskier seems to be asking if his presence was ever actually wanted or appreciated, because he was genuinely always trying to put a smile on Geralt’s face.

The ‘Mr ‘Oh-Look-At-Me’’ carries a double meaning. If that line is referencing Geralt, then Jaskier is almost calling him a poser and an attention seeker, which doesn’t fit with how Geralt actually is, but does fit with other descriptions Jaskier has given him, such as ‘[I forgive you for] your sulking and posing, which are unworthy of a man’.

There’s also potential he’s referring to himself. That he’s saying either that’s how he thinks Geralt sees him (poser, attention seeker) or that in his act to bring Geralt ‘some glee’, he was making a fool of himself. Performing rather than being honest. That he was seeking Geralt’s attention. It’s clearly a negative connotation based on the fact he says it so mockingly, and it could speak to Jaskier’s self-esteem being much lower than it appears at first glance.

The meaning you take from that lyric really depends on how you punctuate those lines. Is it ‘Did I not bring you some glee, Mr ‘Oh-Look-At-Me’?’, in which he’s addressing Geralt, or is it ‘Did I not bring you some glee? Mr ‘Oh-Look-At-Me’?’ In which he’s referring to how he tried to bring glee to Geralt

Now I’ll burn all the memories of you…

It’s giving Eliza Hamilton and I love it. Additionally though, and somewhat in the same vein as Eliza, everyone knows that a lot of Jaskier’s music has been written by him to reframe Witchers and create a positive reputation for Geralt in particular, which makes him famous and gets him more coin. While Geralt, as far as I’m aware, never acknowledges Jaskier’s help in literally promoting him, he himself knows what he’s done for Geralt and acknowledges it frequently.

Jaskier has a unique position where he truly can hurt Geralt, not physically, but by once again altering the way he’s viewed, and undoing all that progress they made. Burning the memories equates to burning any positive image of Geralt that their society started to hold. It just makes me think about ‘I’m burning the memories, burning the letters, that might have redeemed you’.

All those lonely miles / That you ride / Now you’ll walk / With no-one by your side

Self-explanatory. Geralt is alone without a travelling companion after Jaskier leaves, and since Jaskier doesn’t yet know that he’s found Ciri, he thinks Geralt is completely alone.

Did you ever even care? / With your swords and your stupid hair? / Now watch me laugh! / As I burn… all the memories.. of you.

When Jaskier first met Geralt, These were the first things he pointed out about him - “white hair, big old loner, two very, very scary looking swords… I know who you are.”

Pointing that out again is like he’s reverting back to that surface-level view of Geralt, as if he’s forgotten everything else he got to know him as. This time, when he says he’s burning the memories, he means it much more personally than in the sense of burning the positive reputation.

The idea of him laughing as he does it suggests that he’s better off without Geralt, or at least trying to present himself that way.

Ladies and Gentlemen, you have been the most beautiful audience! Remember to toss a coin, if you can! If anyone needs me, I’ll be at the bar.

This bit is spoken and obviously not part of the lyrics but I think it’s worth mentioning that in the scene from the show (as opposed to the song on Spotify) this is where Jaskier actually becomes fully audible. Something about everything he said before this being effectively silenced is interesting to me but I can’t think of what the meaning of that is, character wise.

What for d’you yearn?

I think this lyric is alluding to the famous scene where Jaskier bathed Geralt:

Jaskier: “Come on. You must want something for yourself once all this monster hunting nonsense is over with.”

Geralt: “I want nothing.”

Jaskier: “…Well, who knows! Maybe someone out there will want you.”

Geralt: “I need no-one. And the last thing I want is someone needing me.”

Jaskier: “And yet… here we are.”

It’s the point of no return / After everything we did, we saw / You turned your back on me / What for d’you yearn?

Of course, a reference to the mountain breakup that inspired this whole song, in which Geralt did literally turn his back to him after he ‘basically told (Jaskier) to fuck off’, as he puts it later.

He’s also bringing up their history here, all the things they did and saw together, and how betrayed he feels. It’s clear Jaskier held him in very high regard and has no idea why he isn’t given the same respect, or how Geralt could betray him at all. Jaskier himself has ‘such a capacity for love’, according to Joey Batey, that the idea of Geralt being truly careless and indifferent just feels foreign. He was certain there was something deeper and that Geralt could love, but at this point he’s struggling to believe that.

The ‘Everything we did, we saw’ is an echo of something Jaskier said in Episode 4(?) after he thought Geralt was dead. He said that he wanted to write Geralt another song and tell everyone what they did and saw. This callback makes me think that Jaskier, when writing this song, is thinking of Geralt as being dead to him, as he believed him to be the first time he used this phrasing.

My musician friend informed me that the key of this song is C minor, which she says is perfect as it is usually put to laments. According to google, it's a key for 'declarations of love and at the same time the lament of unhappy love'

Watch that butcher burn!

Geralt hates the ‘Butcher of Blaviken’ title because it implies an uncaring person who kills for the sake of killing, which is not who he is.

Jaskier knows how much Geralt hates the name because he got punched by Geralt the first time he used it.

He’s been the only one trying to help Geralt bury that name and the things it stands for. Deciding to call him a Butcher tells everyone what Jaskier now thinks of Geralt, and makes it increasingly obvious that he no longer cares to change the reputation of that emotionless mutant.

At the end of my days, when I’m through / No word that I’ve written / Will ring quite as true / As ‘burn!’

There’s a certain tragedy in the implication that Jaskier believes he will be spending the rest of his life in the shadow of this time period, the years he spent with Geralt and the aftermath of it, and that nothing he does will ever mean more to him than this.

More importantly, it serves as another reminder of Jaskier’s changed views. He’s written many songs about Geralt, portraying him in a positive light, as a saviour, a protector, a human, and someone that’s good. But he’s taking all that back now. The truth of the matter is, after the mountain breakup, Geralt is nothing but the Butcher of Blaviken to him, and he wants everyone to know it.

Jaskier also mentioned the ‘end of his days’ when he believed Geralt to be dead in episode 4. I find it noteworthy that losing Geralt always seems to make Jaskier think about his own demise. Additionally it drives the point further home that he’s tearing apart Geralt’s reputation, because again, the last time he thought Geralt was dead, he wanted to write songs to make people remember him in a good light. Now, he wants the exact opposite.

Also, Look at the sheet music for this part:

My musician friend pointed out how there’s a lot of ascending and descending notes in this part, which helps to reflect Jaskier’s inner turmoil and his overwhelming emotions.

Burn, Butcher, burn! Burn! Butcher, burn!

At the end of it all, in spite of all his anger, there’s also a sense of desperation. Maybe Jaskier is trying to get Geralt out of his head, forget all that happened, but he can’t. He’s still writing songs about him, at the end of the day.

Maybe he wants to burn the Butcher, as a separate entity to Geralt. He wants to forget the hurt he’s been caused, and wants Geralt to change. Maybe Jaskier wants to see him as heroic again.

He’s angry. But he’s not as over it as he says he is.

Burn! burn! burn! burn. burn. / Burn, burn, / Burn…

As he sings, he gets more overwhelmed, the anger leaves, there just seems to be a bit of a numbness leftover after everything. Jaskier isn’t someone who gets angry often, and he seems to dislike the feeling. It exhausts him. In a way that he doesn’t usually get exhausted after a performance.

Watch me burn… / All the memories… / …Of you.

After the song, he insists that it ‘could be about anyone’ before finally admitting it’s about Geralt. He’s ashamed of the fact he’s still effected by him, and afraid to admit that the song ‘came from the heart. Perhaps a broken one’.

If that’s not enough proof that he had a major crush on Geralt, I don’t know what is.

[ranticore]

So do tiercels just straight up get abducted to be in a harem? Can they say no? Was Cuinn abused by his king?

Kinda, Yes, and Depends On What You Mean By That

the degree of choice a tiercel has in the matter is culturally-dependent. in the eastern Ama plains region (where Cuinn is from) the 'abduction' itself is also slightly romanticised and has its own weird rituals and subconversations; someone who really wants to be a tiercel (very common thing to want tbh) can never just ask for it. they need to do a little "who, me??" coy act at times, and then wait and see how the king behaves - if he fulfils the ideal standards of kingship he should then """kidnap""" them and bring them to his bower which, if he is a good king, should be so impressive and full of treasures that nobody should ever WANT to leave. that's the fantasy of it - a tiercel is another piece of treasure for a king to decorate his nest with. if the king's offer sucks or isn't up to standard, the tiercel can just be like no thanks and fly away again and in this culture it is considered crass for a king to continue to pursue them. the tiercel point of view is "how are YOU going to serve ME". they're birds and their courtship rituals are very elaborate, and even though the tiercel is the one supposedly chosen for their beauty, the king is the equivalent of male birds of paradise doing a funky dance for a visibly bored dull-coloured potential mate.

tiercels in this scenario can leave at any time and they often do. greediness, ambition, and pride are valuable and romanticised traits in a harpy and they are quite accustomed to taking the 'if it sucks hit da bricks' method of combating the sunk cost fallacy. it's not uncommon for a very new or inexperienced king to not have a lot on offer, so a tiercel may choose to join him based on his future potential rather than his current standing, and if he doesn't live up to that potential he's as good as useless.

Cuinn was a fringe case. he was so unusual in appearance that he was basically earmarked to be chosen by a king from the moment of his hatching (should he survive infancy - he almost didn't). it was also known that unpigmented feathers are trash and lose condition easily, and his eyesight was bad, so his future hunting ability was in question. ppl were like ah he's lucky he'll never have to work a day in his life, he's the ultimate tiercel, etc etc. With his story i never wanted his king, Thunder Strike On The Ama, to come across as malicious or mean - he thinks he's doing everything right. he never sexually assaulted Cuinn if that's what you're asking but I think the power dynamic of not just Thunder Strike but the entire flock vs Cuinn was an abusive scenario for him to be in. it didn't matter how well he was treated within that cage. one might even say Cuinn was coercively gendered tiercel from birth (catab if u will)

in truth tiercels and kings get trapped in bad dynamics all the time. the fantasy rarely works out exactly as planned; often enough for it to be a cultural touchstone but look underneath and you'll often find tiercels and kings threatened, held against their will, or indeed assaulted. in much the same way u can't be like "and marriage is a great experience for everyone because it's about love!"

[b0n3s-is-gay]

What does the gang get you for Christmas?

A Very Merry Outsiders Christmas Masterlist -> here!

Darrel Shaynne Curtis:

This man, if he was to get you anything for Christmas, it'd be some simple piece of jewlery that doesn't cost that much.

If you're serious serious in this relationship, like you've been together since Highschool, think 5 years. There's a small chance it'd be his mom's engagement ring. Not the wedding ring of course, Sodapop keeps that close to his body at all times. (I will always write about how Darry would propose, sue me.)

He'd wrap it up in a little bit of tissue paper and then put it in a bag. If it's a necklace, he'd help you put it on and kiss you after.

Keith "Two-bit" Matthews:

This man is a joker through and through, so the first gift is a joke gift. Something to get him laughing and you a bit upset, but he'd never over do it.

The joke gift would be something like chocolates (if you don't like them) or a box of coal.

But his actual gift is a lot more thought out than you might think. It's a butterfly knife, stolen just like his. It's something he hopes you don't have to use but you'll have just in case.

Dallas "Dally" Winston:

Dally doesn't do Christmas. He just doesn't. Don't ask, don't tell.

But if Christmas gifts are really your thing, he'll steal you some kind of expensive piece of clothing you were looking at.

Does he wrap it? No, not at all. He loves you, but not that much.

Sodapop Patrick Curtis:

Sodapop would have a hard time picking something to give to you for Christmas. But, he'd get you something with his own money. Maybe it'd be something small related to your hobby.

He'd get you something nice from his DX funds, think like new paint brushes if you paint or a roll of polaroid blanks if you do photograpgy.

He'll wrap it up with help from Darry. Nice little packaging or bag depending on what hobby you have and what he got you.

Steve Randle:

Something homemade. He does work at the DX but his money is pitted towards his survival, so he'll make you something for Christmas.

Maybe a little wooden heart or a few metal roses. Like that little picture captioned with "I will love you until this rose wilts", that kind of metal rose. That's what he'd get you.

He'll tie it up with a little bow or ribbon and give it to you with a kiss under the mistletoe.

Johnny Cade:

Much like Steve, Johnny doesn't have much money for gifts. So he'll take you out to dinner or make dinner for you.

I see him as a quick learner and he's always watching when others cook. So he'll pull out some of Darry's recipes and make you a wonderful dinner to the best of his abilities.

He'll meet you at the door, pull you inside, and treat you like a princess the whole night. He'll even dress up (with what he has) and wine and dine you for Christmas. He loves you, trust.

Ponyboy Michael Curtis:

He's drawing you for Christmas. His gift will be customized artwork of you.

When I say customized art work, I think he'll have a refrence photo of you and he'll draw you with words he thinks describe you. Something like this.

When he gives you the picture, it'll be in a little envelope with the sweetest little christmas love note. He's cheesy, don't hold it against him.

Tags: @witchyleehibernates

[helluverse-rewrites]

kind of random but ! viv desperately needs to try smth other than animal motifs for her symbolism. I know animals are an easy choice for things like that, but her dependence on it is a (small) part of what makes her designs so ass.

It gets to the point to where characters have the same motif and for what? They're not connected. The least she could do is make them connected. (for example in my hazbin hotel redesigns i made all the angels have bird motifs. vaggie is a dove, adam is a rooster, lucifer a duck) I know kemonomimis and furries are fun to draw but sometimes its just plain confusing and overused. Esp when she puts more focus on that than shapes or colors or even personality sometimes! I guess I'd love to see more characters based on objects or even common phrases, fairytales, time periods, abstract concepts. Yk? There are more of these in helluva boss (even though theyre highly LACKING), some background characters are like this in hazbin. I can see the 7 sins are somewhat based on their concept, but again its lacking, because she always goes back to her animal things. And I know this whole helluverse started out with zoophobia or wtv but cmon. Whys valentino a moth? I dont know any symbolism of the moth that ties in with val, or even how he died. He'd generally be better as a shadow or a puppet master, given hes deceptive and manipulative. The animal motifs often feel tacked on, too. Like a last minute thought, or like a design first-story later thing. Which even if they are, it shouldn't feel that way. It's really just a pet peeve of mine I guess because a lot of people including 14 yr old me thought these characters were soooo high concept and unique when really they somehow have worse design principals/patterns than Spongebob (not an insult to my boy spongebob though, theyre all just sea creatures they dont need to be high concept). Animals are literally the most overused, easy way to tell the audience something (or nothing). Like jesus christ its like whatever goal they have for a character they go hmmmmmm this is hard Ill just give them cat ears ^^.

Oh my god you're right

Angel Dust doesn't even look like a spider, and Alastor looks nothing like a deer. Istg the Valentino concept is way more interesting than whatever Viv did

You're telling me that Asmodeus is supposed to be a rooster. Likely story but okay Ig :/

I just think that the shows could've branched out a bit more than just animals

[chrysanthemumgames]

I have a perhaps personal ask, and at the same time struggling with how to phrase it. I've been looking into making an interactive story myself, however, I... cannot code. For the life of me. I can tell one hell of a story, but coding it beyond my grasp, and the system I currently use, while it ought to be simple enough even someone like me could do so, isn't exactly working for how I want it to. Do you perhaps know anything anywhere that I might start looking for someone who would be willing to work with me? I am so sorry if this is a bothersome ask.

Hi anon!

I'm probably not the best person for advice on this, because I've never been in that situation before. I've put some thoughts under the cut, with the caveat that only a small portion of them actually address the question you've asked, with the majority being related but perhaps not helpful for you, depending.

So, I think where you'd go to find a coding person depends on what language you're using. If it's ChoiceScript, probably the forums. If it's Twine... I honestly don't know. Maybe the subreddit, though you'll want to double-check that such requests are not against the rules there.

I sincerely doubt you'll have an easy time finding someone, though. Most folks who code in the systems used for IF are IF authors who taught themselves the coding techniques in order to tell their own stories, not someone else's.

That said, and this is the part you can ignore, because you know yourself better than I do, but... I'm pretty sure you can learn to code. It's not easy, necessarily, and it doesn't come intuitively to everyone, but there are resources out there to help you. Again, this will depend on what system you're using, but the CS forums are very useful for figuring out CS (as is the wiki, once you know enough to parse it). For Twine, there are loads of archived posts on their forums and on the subreddit for specific questions, but for general ones, the documentation for your preferred program (e.g. SugarCube), the Twine Cookbook, and similar resources will break things down into smaller, more digestible chunks. I personally recommend the Twine Grimoire (volumes 1 and 2), for basic interface aesthetics, once you get to that point.

Here on tumblr, @/nyhelism, @/cerberus-writes, @/manonamora-if, @/idrellegames, and others have all answered questions about Twine coding or even in some cases made templates that take a lot of the work out of it. Most have a masterpost regarding things they've answered about Twine or made for others' use, but be sure to check that they're currently accepting coding questions before sending them any, of course.

Learning to code may be slow and incremental, and lots of people manage better if they start with a small project just to learn how to do the basic things in their language of choice. I'd really recommend figuring out what you need your game to be able to do, and learning those functions one by one—it's less overwhelming than trying to tackle everything at once while also writing a huge project.

If all else fails, my most esoteric suggestion is to familiarize yourself with the basic principles of symbolic logic. I took a class in it as part of my degree, and have since also taught that class, and I think understanding things like the logic of conditionals (if statements) as they're used in coding (rather than natural language) really gave me a leg up in learning to code. Not that I'm an expert, but I know enough to make a basic game, at least.

Most (all?) of these things should be findable with a google search; I know there are at least some Twine tutorials on youtube as well, though I'm unsure of CS or any of the languages I'm less familiar with, like Ink, etc.

I do apologize that the section where I encourage you to do the thing you don't think you can do is longer than the one where I answered your actual question, but that's the part I might actually have something useful to say about. If you're absolutely certain you can't do it, I'm sorry for banging on about it, but if you're not sure or on the fence, maybe give it another go before trying to find another person. I've seen a lot of writers looking for coders in the past, but maybe only once was a coder offering their services to writers (and that was a long time ago).

[chromatic-lamina]

Law couldn't kill his biological parents

Because the government had done it for him. 👇

Doflamingo, on the other hand— ☝️

Law did, however, inadvertently enclose his sibling in a death trap 👇

But, like Cora, he didn't pull the trigger.

(but also, like Doflamingo, he didn't die).

Doflamingo, like Law was not responsible for the loss of his and Rosi's childhood protection and innocence 👇

And Homing seemed to be more ineffectual (at least in the anime) than Law's Dad, although he was up against a LOT, but obviously underprepared. Guess the slaves did all the fighting and defending in Marie Geoise. I don't think it's reason enough to get your brains blown out.

Conversely, Law's dad was proactive and there seemed to be little reason for Law to despise him. His individual actions also hadn't brought on the ire of angry mobs over sustained periods of time, but Law did experience this once h'ed lost everything.

And the people of Flevance were collectively targeted for who they were. Both fathers were generally targeted for what they represented rather than who they were. Likewise, Law, and the Donquixote brothers were targeted in similar ways. All three carried a hereditary affliction, depending on which way you look at it.

BUT I believe that Law deeply wanted to believe both Doflamingo's words about blood ties, and Cora's words about Doflamingo not going to shoot him because he was his brother (despite Cora also saying two chapters previously that Doflamingo would expect Cora to die for him if he consumed the Ope-Ope no Mi, because Doflamingo would expect Cora to perform the eternal youth operation).

I believe that Law wants to believe the words of the brothers, because there was nothing more shocking in the world for him (up to the point of Cora's death) than to have his sister and mother and father (and classmates and teacher) die in front of him. And as said in another meta:

He had stayed behind to look after Lami: An action which ironically saved him from perishing with his classmates, but which might have sealed Lami's fate. I don't think he could imagine deliberately harming his family. Of course, he is 13 on Minion Island, and is not Doflamingo's 28 years of age. (And 10 year old Doflamingo definitely protected Rosi, before he killed their father).

Law did, nonetheless, show that at a young age he was able to inflict harm on fairly random strangers when he shanked Cora, not without provocation (but he paid Buffalo off in ice cream, so the child or the psychopath were both perhaps evident in Law. Seeing as we know canon events, my cash is on the former. Without intervention, though, who knows?) Provocation might have been wearing the name genocide.

But, back to family. Considering how upset Law was with the loss of his family, and understandably how traumatic it is to have a loved one, loved ones, one's whole town, slaughtered in front of you, especially at the age of eight or slightly older (yes, when Doflamingo shot Homing, he was the age that Law was when Flevance fell (10 years), then...

...then I really don't blame Cora for not being head-over-heels in love with his brother. I find claims that Doffy's actions "weren't that bad" puzzling. I think there are some things and states of being that you can just never return to. Violation is violation, and at the age that Cora was (eight-years-old) the effects run deep (but, c'mon, you're in the same room as a killer who happens to be your brother; you're being held by your father, and then you're covered in your father's blood, brains and bone shards? Did his dying body fall on you? And your brother's still holding the gun? And you're eight? Even as an adult, I don't think I'd recover).

Homing should have fought and protected Rosi, though, in this instance, and stepped up as much as he could have, and maybe he did. And, yeah, Doflamingo was seemingly influenced and manipulated by his much older (bar Vergo) executives, but he's the dude holding the smoking gun in the end! I'm not saying he's not a ten-year old victim too, but he's a scary one, especially due to his youth. Others (protagonists) in the One Piece world have escaped ineffective or cruel parenting with far less bloodshed to others or their kin (antagonists, not so much).

I love Doflamingo. He's a fabulous villain with a tragic back story. He's complex, layered and fun to write. And the nature/nurture argument rages hugely with him, and yeah, his pragmatics do make some things good for some people some of the time. But that man knows how to move goal posts, and the posts are booby-trapped.

Anyhoo, maybe this is another dive into the parallels between Law and Doflamingo that veer off into very different paths. And that I love a bat-shit-crazy Donquixote Family AU as much as the next person, BUT I think that Cora was rightly very wary of his brother and that he has/had good reason to be. In canon-verse, if he hadn't died (so AU canon-verse!) I can't see him returning happily back to the Family. True, though. You mess with fire, you get burnt, but Doffy is far from a saint, and I think Cora's aware of that at an intrinsic and self-preserving level.

[winterpeta1s]

teehee what r some of ur bunnydoll headcanons <3

Hii, depends on if we're talking about headcanons that could fit the canon or that are just wishful thinking on my part haha

One of them is that i think Jax is canonically the only person Ragatha is genuine with, in the sense that she doesn't hide that she dislikes him. And maybe she secretly enjoys arguing with him for that reason, she seeks his attention just as much as he seeks hers, if you pay attention she is always searching for reasons to confront him or scold him even when it's not that necessary, (maybe she takes out her bad feelings on him?) Either way i think she's glad that Jax exists somehow, it keeps things balanced and maybe it makes her look better in comparison? (I love my toxic parents)

Another is that Jax can see right through her act of attempt at niceness thats why he cuts her short when she tries to comfort him, like "shut up i know you're just trying to be what you're not and it doesn't fit you it's annoying"

I think most of the circus can sense that Ragatha isn't pure genuine but Jax doesn't hide that he does, my headcanon is that he's always observing her (and probably observing everyone else at the circus to know their weaknesses) and paying attention and thats how he knows what she likes or dislikes but he will never admit that she's his favorite to look at (my wishful thinking)

Jax would be very sad if something happened to her though, I think they both care for each other in a way, or at least they both really seek for each other's attention subconsciously in the show

I think the headcanon that they were exes if something i believe in more after last episodes but who knows

Now if we go into shipping territory i think as a couple they would be way too physically attached to each other, not in public though!

Ragatha strikes me as someone who needs physical touch all the time, and Jax doesn't mind.

He flirts by playing with her hair and ribbon, he flirts by teasing and mocking her, sometimes he just picks her up and lifts her on his shoulders in public to embarrass her

(Did i do that right? This headcanon thing?)

[goodluckclove]

Are You A Video Gamer??? (Looking for Beta Testers)

Okay so if you've known me for some time you might've heard I am married to someone who is, among many other things, a really cool and capable indie game developer. My wife Riley has finally declared themselves in beta for their dice-based rougelike Astragali, and they could really use some more beta testers to get it to a solid finished product.

For those unfamiliar, a rougelike is a style of game built upon procedurally-generated levels that make it so every run is fresh. You die a lot, but you also have the capacity to get ridiculously powerful with a few smart choices. Think of games like Hades or The Binding of Issac, only this is a far shorter play experience that my wife says can be beaten in around a half hour.

Astragali is a darkly-atmospheric, low-poly dream where you find yourself playing round after round of a dice game that - at first - seems deceptively simple. Only something's not right. You're in a liminal space where everything is simultaneously jarring and oddly stagnant. Who are these people? Why do they keep playing? Why do you keep playing - and what will happen once you finally win?

Some dice are just a plain d6, and others like a coin with two sides. But with some dice, the smaller numbers actually double your score. Or the dice might be stronger if you keep them in your hand and never play them at all. There are even dices that increase your score depending on how many of your opponents dice you take your turn to destroy. You have a lot of power at your disposal, a strategy that can change depending on what you have access to - but so does the person you're playing against.

But they don't seem to care, do they? They keep lining up, and yet none of this really seems to matter.

Astragali is fresh in beta, meaning the developer is mainly looking for vibes. They've created a short feedback survey for anyone looking to download the game and go through it. I wouldn't say the bar to entry is very high in regards to skill - I am pretty bad at a lot of video games and I am able to pick it up and enjoy it. I actually love it. It's a great way to have a sort of eerie, horror-adjacent gaming experience without jumpscares or graphic content. It's a very cool experience with a few surprises for the player to find, and I would love for Riley to get the insight they need from a larger sample size so they can release the game in the next few months.

Interested? Comment below or DM me for the link to the file! It's a small .exe that runs on my Lenovo Yoga no problem.

Support indie gaming support my wife come on man be cool

[another-random-paradise]

Hi hi!!

Could I request a (London 24) Greaseball, Electra, Dinah, and Rusty cuddle Hc :-). Also have a good Day/Night and drink lots of water!!

Cuddles

Thank you for the request!! Tbh I love cuddles, so all of these ended up a bit long hahaha, hope you enjoy <3

---------------------------------------------------------

Characters cuddling with reader

Characters: Greaseball, Electra, Dinah, Rusty

Format: Headcanons

Version: London revival 2024

Warnings: none!

Greaseball

-Refuses to be the small spoon, thinks it would make her seem weak

-Likes to just hold you, really. Her personal favourite is the two of you laying down somewhere, you laying on her chest with her arms around you!  Basic, but good :) plus, this way she gets to use you as a weighted blanket; something she didn't know she needed

-Falls asleep pretty fast. The moment you two lay/sit down, and you're comfortably in her arms, she's out like a light. 

-She always claims that she's just tired after a day of hard work, but really she finds cuddling with you oddly comforting, like she can just escape her busy schedule for a bit

-Has a death grip on you, once she's asleep, you aren't going anywhere. I also believe her to be a deep sleeper, so waking her up isn't easy to wake up either (she'd also be moody if woken up)

-Despite that, if you do manage to escape her grip, for whatever reason, she is up within the minute, and she is not happy. Will hunt you down, especially if it's already late out, and drag you back to your cuddle spot, probably while grumbling something incohesive

-Another type of cuddle she likes is to just come up behind you randomly throughout the day, wrap her arms around you, and not let go till she has to go back to work

-Doesn't care if you're in a conversation with someone, you're her partner! She doesn't even pretend to care about the conversation; if the other person asks what she's doing or tries to include her in the conversation, she will just stare them down

-You'd have to be the one to tell her you don't want to cuddle at the moment, she'd act annoyed and grumble about it, but ultimately respect your wishes

--she just really enjoys holding you, it makes her feel like your protector :)

Electra

-While they're more reserved in public, in private they're as affectionate as can be!

-Always has to be touching you in some way when it's just you two, or when the only ones around are their components, so they're always happy to cuddle 

-While they don't mind being the little spoon, they prefer to be the big spoon - they enjoy holding you a lot, it makes them feel important. It also shows them that you have a certain level of trust in them :) 

-I don't think they're the type to fall asleep while cuddling, they much prefer to give their attention to you; talking about nothing in specific, maybe discussing the newest gossip, simply relaxing in each others arms..

-Don't worry about falling asleep yourself, though! again, to them it simply shows how much trust you have in them! They also adore how peaceful you look asleep - simply adorable in their opinion

-They'd admire your sleeping form, perhaps run a hand through your hair.. and while they won't fall asleep themself, they'll use the moment to relax a bit, closing their eyes and just enjoying the peace and quit - which seems to be something very rare in this chaos of a yard

-Starlight forbid someone tries to wake you up, though. They already hate it when others interrupt you two - but if they might wake you? Nothing a small electric shock, of varying strength depending on who it is, and a mean glare, can't fix though 

-The only time they'll fall asleep while cuddling, is if you're cuddling at night, and even then they're probably awake before you. Chances are, you won't ever see them sleep, unless you got a very messed up sleep schedule or get up before the crack of dawn

-If you're okay with it, the components may occasionally join your little cuddle sessions! Usually after a especially rough day, could range from just one or two, to all of you creating a straight up cuddle pile. But if you want it to just be you and Electra, they completely respect that

-The amount of cuddles would increase in the winter - especially if you aren't a electric, and therefore naturally produce warmth! Electrics don't produce any heat, so the winter is even crueler to them, than it is already are to everyone else; and cuddling, especially somewhere cozy, just happens to be a very nice way to warm up :)

-If you're a steam engine, or in other words literally run on fire, they would just not let go of you in the winter

Dinah

-Literally the sweetest, will take any chance she can get to be affectionate with you! 

-Another one that doesn't care whether she is the little or the big spoon, though she is more used to being the little spoon

-I would recommend letting her, at least occasionally, be the big spoon, though! especially after a rough day, her hold is really comforting!

-But no matter how you two are cuddled up, it is always a really soft and sweet moment; you two are usually talking about whatever comes to mind - anything from a deep discussion about the state of the world, to planning your next date, nothings off the table :)

-While she claims not to have a favourite cuddle position, she adores it whenever you two are cuddled up on the couch, with a warm drink in hand, and her head on your shoulder. Bonus points if it's in the winter, and you two are quietly watching the snow fall

-doesn't really care if anyone walked in on you two cuddling, she's very open about her affection for you, and she would love it if you are two!

- She's the type to randomly just stare at you while cuddling, with nothing but love in her eyes - if you ask her why, she'll simply say that she's wondering how she got so lucky :)

-She would also randomly attack you with kisses - a bunch of small pecks wherever she can reach, before finishing with a final peck on the lips, and giggling about it; especially if you blush because of it, she loves making you blush!

-However, if you respond in kind she'll be redder than her hair! ;) 

-One of her dream dates would be the two of you watching stars together, while cuddling on a picnic blanket! Maybe you were watching the sunset together beforehand, maybe as a spontaneous idea.. all she really cares about is your time together 

-If you're a racer, she'll give you a hug before and after every race, that lasts long enough to might as well be considered cuddling! If you actually win a race, or even just place on the podium, she'll almost tackle you in the excitement! 

Rusty

- All you could ever wish for in the winter, and your worst nightmare in the summer

-Seriously, Steam engines run hot! it would be like sleeping right next to the fire place, or cuddling with a living, really warm, heating pad

-You'd probably end up still cuddling in the summer, because he loves being close to you, but it would be more you holding onto his arm - he wants to get closer, but understands you not wanting to overheat

-...also the first few nights, during your first summer together, he probably thought he did something to upset you, and that's why you don't want to cuddle, and you just couldn't stand that sad look of his 

-It's a whole different story during winter, though! You'd probably be the one holding onto him all day! and he wouldn't mind at all, were it not for work

-But the moment he's off the clock, he's speeding directly into your arms :)

- You guys would end up in all kinds of different cuddle positions, all your limbs usually tangled by the end of it

-I don't think he has a favourite position, nor does he care about being the big or the little spoon, he just wants to be as close as possible to you. He isn't exactly used to being this loved, so he'll take anything he can get

-continuing with my last point, when you guys cuddled for the first time, he was really awkward. He didn't know where to put his limbs, or how he should hold you - or if he should hold you at all!

-you'd have to have given him a lot of pointers, and take charge of getting comfortable for the first few times you guys cuddled. After he got the hang of it, though? Absolute cuddle bug, he never wants to let go of you

-If you cuddle at night, getting up in the morning would be really hard for him. Why should he get up and go to work, when he can stay here, cuddled up to you? He contemplates calling in sick every time

-Similarly, getting home from work and falling into your arms is like a reward, one that he looks forward to every day!

--He really just loves being close to you!

Hope you enjoyed!! I definitely enjoyed writing it :)

Feedback is always welcome, just pls be nice about it

Take care of yourself and have a lovely night/day <3

[oonajaeadira]

Hi Adira! I am in awe of your tarot decks collection. As someone who’s long wanted to explore the practice, can you suggest some starter decks for newbies? Or just some favourites - I love seeing the ones that people are especially attached to! Thank you! ❤️

Heya, Rose!!!! Oooooo. I have opinions. Let's go with these three:

RIDER-WAITE-SMITH

I mean, you can't go wrong with the original Rider-Waite-Smith deck. Most illustrated decks are built on the iconography of that deck and if you end up reading any books on the subject, they're going to reference that deck.

.

LIGHT SEER'S TAROT

However. If that one doesn't resonate with you, I highly highly highly recommend the Light Seer's Tarot. Chris Anne has done a phenomenal job of reinterpreting all of Pixie's original illustrations, but have given them so much life and emotion that they immediately evoke feelings (unlike the OG deck which can feel very flat if you don't know what to look for) and this can make it easier for you to start remembering what all the cards mean. And they're so layered too so as you grow, you'll see and understand new symbols and nuances in the card which can help you be a more intuitive reader.

She REALLY understands the meaning of the cards and knows what to include and what to update to give it the same push, PLUS there's high diversity in the people that are depicted in the cards when it comes to race, age, orientation and style depicted, making them feel very modern while still very mystical.

The whole deck also feels very hopeful and forward moving, which really helps to temper some of the messages if you're looking for a gentle therapy deck.

And, of course, it's inexpensive! You can generally find it for around $20. There's a standard size and a "travel" or mini size, depending on your preference. (Minis are good for on the go and shuffling with small hands, but standard size really allows you to see the images and read better.)

What's more, Chris Anne provides free learning materials! Not only is the included booklet a good starter reference, you can go to her website to see/learn more about each card and download a "field notes" journal for free!!!

LABRINTHOS

Of course, if you wanna just dip a toe in with minimal commitment or cost, I can highly recommend the Labryinthos app.

Not only is the app free, but it will give you free daily readings and allow you to journal about them. There are tarot lessons so you can learn the cards as well. I will say that the readings and lessons are very very general and short, they won't go into a lot of detail. But if you're the kind of learner that wants to build a quick and easy association with the cards, this is a really helpful resource for daily practice.

.

Of course, with these three choices, it depends on what kind of learner you are! If you are a flashcard-method person, go for Labyrinthos. Want to dig around in books and learn a little more classically? Rider-Waite-Smith. And if you want to learn to read with your heart and dive in a little more poetically, Light Seer's is your gentle and loving teacher.

.

Bonus deck:

PAGAN OTHERWORLDS

Now if you wanna talk about my attachments? If I had a tarot soulmate, this is it.

This is my very favorite deck for its faithful interpretations and soft + wild + classical style. This is a deck that's best used if you really love the RWS original but want to look past the people--all the minor arcana cards are depicted faithfully...but without people. It also comes with a few extra cards that are for mysterious intuitive reading. So it's best to know tarot a little first before diving into this one, but it is beautiful and speaks to the old things in my soul. This is a great graduation deck, and one that feels like a big treat because it's not cheap, but it's beautifully manufactured, nice to handle, and has some beautiful surprises. While the Light Seer's deck sings to your heart, the Pagan Otherworlds deck whispers to something hidden deep inside.

.

I hope that was helpful for you!!!! I'm excited to see folks start on a tarot journey!!!! <3

[desperate-daemon-days]

Excellent choice, the slash dash build is generally considered the more 'meta' one for lvlcap but also I dont care personally and like katanas and laser swords Read more bc this is gonna be long AND unstructured. Like, really fucking long

So excalibur-ESPECIALLY his exalted blade builds-struggle a lot wherein you have to sacrifice either a large chunk of damage or a large chunk of survivability and i swear all the loud dubstep intro youtubers kinda forget about that. You'll quickly find yourself getting frustrated you cant just barely eke out one or the other, but WHATEVER (Also apologies for shitty formatting)

This is my general purpose build for umbra himself specifically leaning into his exalted blade, though it should be noted you can definitely swap things out depending on what you want from him. In this case, i like red crits, so wrathful advance-it makes chromatic blade crit, and combined with 747% status chance from the augment thats a lotta damage. That being said, i am aware not everyone skill issues like me into the sun, so i'll be providing alternatives depending on your tastes and how you wanna flavour your sword frame. Treat this more as a pick and choose, rather than a bible for what to do always. My mods are selected based on my playstyle and skill lvl, and it works into high SP lvls, but everyone is different. Theres some things that i could update looking at this-but admittedly, i havent touched it in a little while. This particular build is on the squishier side, and has some quirks born from problems i ran into with general day to day play.

Disclaimer; i am not a uber stronk gamar who never gets hit by anything. For such builds there are ten billion youtube videos. Don't care for the explanation? Easy summary of my build only; 2 Umbrals + brief/rolling + reaper + healing return = dual health/shield tanking. Combo with Guardian for shield refresh. Arcane fury for raw damage. Archon flow with cold emissive chromatic blade for energy gen, + corrosive on blade for armour strip. Lean into crit chance/damage/raw damage/faction if not lazy. Status chance covered by Chromatic blade.

Companion is dethcube with tenacious bond + vulklok to hit crit threshold. Energy generator + guardian for orbs and shield. other mods to taste, synth deconstruct good for healing + shard equilibrium. Madurai for ability strength or Naramon for combo decay reduction. Even vazarin for survivability isnt bad. Up to taste/needs, Subsume wrathful over 2 for crit chance.

Shards are

-2 amber tauforged (Energy orb efficiency-can replace one with casting speed, could get rid of other one for more melee crit damage but wouldn't recommend it) -2 Violet tauforged (one equilibrium style, other melee crit damage) -1 Azure tauforged (for raw health, but can replace with more melee crit damage easily. im just scared a lot) Keep reading if you want reasonings/alternatives!

Base frame mods/Arcanes

In terms of his survival, you can either lean heavily into health tanking if you wanna do gloom (in which case, replace brief respite with growing power, or even corrosive projection if you dont run smth else for armour strip like corrosive. Adaptation is still not worth it though over rolling, bc he has zero innate DR and no status cleanse), or do your conventional pure shield tanking with your 1/2/3 being your shield refresh button with brief respite/rolling guard/, and replace reaper with smth like aegis, or even a damage/ability arcane like molt augmented. Or you can mix it up, like I do, since i supplement my shields with my drone (i'll get to that in a minute) and use a single tauforged blue for base health.

Either way, he has nothing for survival, and you CANNOT do invis based survival bc exalted blade breaks shade/huras, you'll be running around too much for quiver to be consistent (unless you like doing that silly arrow trick in the sentinel) and....well, you're welcome to try and consistently headshot with a sword. Invuln based survival is a slash dash only, im afraid. If you do slash dash, invis through companion is your go-to, with rolling in the event your little dude dies. (I like not clenching my ass even during basic missions, and I like scaling beyond basic lvl 400 stuff so) Raw stat-wise, you obviously want to run duration + strength. Efficiency is the drop stat here bc going negative range reaaaally sucks for furious javelin, and also affects your 1, which in this build is basically rolling guard...2! As mentioned, you become fully invulnerable, so if your rolling guard is down you can ride out a status effect with it, or if you find yourself low health etc. The 'duration' is dependent on how many enemies you chain to-which is affected by range. Hence, low efficiency, higher duration to compensate. It wont do as much damage bc you'll be using your 4 as its stat determiner, but it should still be decent. High strength is self explanatory. (It should be noted that even if you slash dash into nothing, you'll still get a brief window of invulnerability. No shame in hurtling yourself down a corridor with it)

Arcane wise, as expected on a melee build, fury is basically compulsory for that big damage spike. You could run avenger, but it won't be the most consistent since ideally you're either shield gate invulnerable or slowing shit down with gloom to prevent getting hit mostly entirely. Arcane strike is another alternative, if you want to not need to slot any attack speed mods at all. As for the other slot-basically, either run reaper if you want hp regen, or aegis if you reaaaally want to commit to shields. Or, if you're confident in your rolling skills, slot on more ability strength/duration/melee boosting arcanes. Hell, energize is a good option, but i hate recommending it bc i still dont have it maxed :,D I am not that confident in my shield tanking (ESPECIALLY since i used to mostly do endurance runs against infested pre toxin/disruptor nerf), so hence my choice. No matter what you do, your biggest enemy will remain nullifiers and toxin eximus. Under absolutely NO CIRCUMSTANCES can you allow yourself to be caught with no energy/unable to cast, so treat him like a squishy caster frame, not a tanky melee frame.

NOTE: You can use normal primed flow. You want base energy for violet shard threshold (and energy ofc), but specifically archon flow is there because exalted weapons count as ability kills, which we'll be touching on in a sec.

Augments

We love chroma jank Furious javelin is one of those mods which reaally should be base functionality, because Radial javelin does so little damage its nonexistent. It's a lot better than it seems, because the damage multiplier basically acts like a melee only pre-change eclipse without the lighting fuckery. Sticking it in a large group, with decent ability strength you can easily reach several hundred %. That being said, there are some build variations without this, with javelin being subsumed for something else and purely leaning on the raw weapon damage instead. (Usually status DOT based blade builds are the ones that do this, which...i don't like status that much. I am biased bc status builds fall apart real fast when it comes to single target damage against stuff like acolytes/necramechs etc. Violence is terrifying and your goal is not to explode to them.) There is a sort of line-of-sight mech, but its a bit wonky-but generally, range = more enemies hit. Roll your way into a crowd and hit it. Chromatic blade is basically compulsory for any exalted blade build. It means we dont need to build any status chance on the weapon itself, and can commit to other multipliers. As for the status on the blade...well, it depends, AGAIN, on taste. I am forever afraid of no energy, so I run cold; this allows me to use archon flow for free orbs, with corrosive modded onto the weapon. You could also do electricity for corrosive, or heat for viral/heat (or heat/corrosive, your taste). Archon continuity also works, if you wanna only rock pure toxin. The world is your oyster! Just keep in mind the element does combine, but it'll prioritize what's on the blade itself.

Exalted Blade

Copy pasting the picture so you dont need to scroll lol

If i had made this build post galvanised mods, I would use them over sac steel. This is because Wrathful advance already covers my crit needs, so more raw crit damage would be better. Likewise, replacing gladiator might with galvanised elementalist or a faction mod may be better, and I would swap berserker fury with magnetic rush.

The reason why I am using 'may' and 'might' here is because it really, really isnt needed.

lvl 205 steel path corrupted gunners with basically 0 combo explode violently all the same. If you have those new mods, put them on! Or don't. Just treat it as you would any other crit based melee. Just keep in mind chromatic gets rid of the slash damage that comes with exalted's stats. Your damage modding does matter more if you decide to go for a more tanky build with gloom or eclipse, though.

What tennokai you use also is really up to taste, but its important you have it, so you can get free wrathful procs if you're using wrathful advance, or well...free heavies in general.

Companion

Because exalted is a channel, regen based energy sources do not work at all. So, you'll need orbs. Archon flow in my experience is not enough, even with all the shards i have slotted, so here comes dethcube to save the day.

Keep in mind the only really 'compulsory' mods are tenacious bond (for crit damage), Energy generator and Guardian. Everything else is to taste; but duplex bond is even more energy, momentous bond helps with damage + uptime, and everything else is general utility or survivability. Any vulklok build with a crit mod on it should push you over the 50% required.

Focus school

Really, this one is just whatever is comfy for you. Zenurik is always nice for the starting energy + ability strength from hardened wellspring, Madurai is...madurai, and Naramon is always nice for anything involving melees. Vazarin is solid for keeping you alive as usual, and Unairu helps with armour strip. I use zenurik bc again, im always shrieking about energy, but Madurai is best.

Subsumes I use wrathful because red crit = satisfying damage, and I love nuke or die builds. However! You can also run Roar or Xata's or Nourish if you wanna buff your damage in other ways (nourish in particular solves energy problems real well so it was very tempting). IRC Wrathful maths out to be the highest multiplier for raw damage, tho. Gloom or Eclipse are also very solid defensive options (as expected), but keep in mind you'll be losing a modifier for damage. There are prolly other funny options like tempest barrage for corrosive/viral if you wanna run the augment, or fuckin. Reave? Actually that would be a funny one now that i think about it but these are my solid picks. Gloom is safe. Gloom is comfy. Everyone puts gloom on everything for a reason. Same with eclipse. But personally, I think warframe is most enjoyed when walking on the edge of an explosion you yourself are generating.

As for what to subsume over, your 2 or 1 are my recommendations. Again, blind does nothing against eximus or overguarded enemies, so imo its the weakest of the kit if you're using javelin aug, whereas 1 can still be used as a consistent survival tool. If not using FJ, get rid of javelin obviously lol

Shards

Now, the 'optimal' sharding would probably be something like 4 violet tauforged for melee crit damage, 1 for casting. But in anything that has lower enemy density/has infested, you'll probably find yourself struggling a little. I like to make my builds as general purpose as possible; aka not only comfortably playable in survival sp missions. Hence, energy efficiency + equilibrium lite.

Energy effectiveness affects how much is recovered from the equilibrium as well, and we cant really fit the base mod on because Excal is already a 2 augment warframe with the only survivability coming from mods, so we're already strapped for space horrifically so. You could replace the equi shard with another crit damage one, though. I dont run casting bc i dont personally feel the need for it (the only thing with real casting delay is your 3, which isn't used too frequently) As for the azure shard, Reaper is hp% recovered, so it gives more wiggle room. Not needed at all, but again, i mod for comfort in a wide variety of missions, and this is what I personally find comfortable.

Realistically, if you arent a coward like me, smth like 1 casting, 1 energy orb effectiveness and 3 melee crit damage shards is more than enough. You could also experiment with the elemental shards; remember, exalted blade is considered an ability AND melee.

Anything else?

For weapons, bring at least one gun-or even melee!-that can gun down an acolyte by itself. I know that defeats the purpose somewhat, but violence is the menace of every casting frame everywhere, and even if your weapons can oneshot, nothing can account for shitty spawns. JUST IN CASE. JUST IN CASE!

Unfortunately, you cannot stat-stick exalted blade with gladiator mods. This is partially why desert wind is so much better than exalted. Any gladiator mods you wanna use? gotta be on it.

yes i did have to forma away umbral polarities. yes it does feel treasonous.

No, this build does not fare exceptionally well against rogue necramechs or archons or anything with that style of damage attenuation. Unfortunately, theres nothing in excal's kit that can bypass that. Not even slash dash. In fact slash dash builds are worse for that, as it cannot properly target them, and you'll burn through energy spamming it on one target.

If the sentience of umbra/disabling of buffs when going into operator pisses you off, dont forget the exilus augment is available. I personally dont really care, so i just slapped psf in there bc its a crutch at this point lmao

if you want the same experience as excalibur with half the stress and thrice the damage, just play baruuk. But where's the fun in that?

Well now that I’ve asked arthur out can someone please tell me how to make excalibur umbra good

[itsahotminuteinbetween]

me on tumblr: oh i just love flowers they're so pretty and i love the symbolism so much-

me in my head while creating bouquets: HOW MUCH PAIN AND ANGST CAN I PACK INTO A SINGULAR PLANT WHILE MAKING IT STILL SEEMINGLY INNOCENT

[alongtidesoflight]

so here's my honest thoughts on dragon age: the veilguard, after ~40 hours of playing. i finished the main quest after having finished all companion quests and major faction quests. just to clear up what content i saw, i played as an elven transmasc rook who is a member of the lords of fortune. he romanced lucanis (although after finishing the game i'm now leaning towards taash). i don't know what's happening in playthroughs that have a different race, gender identity, romance or faction going on.

full spoilers ahead, i mean it. don't read further if you want to avoid them. i don't want complaining about it in my asks.

oh and also, if you're worried because of a few negative reviews online i can comfort you by saying don't give a fuck about a certain big name youtuber who is very much tied to bethesda franchises giving this a negative review. i'll explain why.

i'm starting off with the things i liked

the game looks really pretty. i was worried it wouldn't feel like thedas anymore (with them trying to "focus on northern thedas only" i thought they'd make a clear cut in environmental design. they do and they don't. it's complicated. i'll elaborate on it when talking about the negative stuff). anyway it does. minrathous feels like kirkwall. treviso enchanted me like the winter palace did. the hossberg wetlands reminded me of the hinterlands and a couple other inquisition maps. arlathan looked like... arlathan. the crossroads were different, but familiar. overall i like the way it looks and feels. it's thedas, with a twist. it's a good one, and gives everything a solid but unique feel.

combat is top tier. if you're a hardcore dragon age player you WILL miss the tactical aspect of it for a bit, but i promise you, once you're used to the way the combat works, you will be lapping that shit up. and once you get to ability combos you'll mourn the control you used to have over your companions in battle a bit less

the MAIN quest and its story. i expected worse, way worse. and for a while the game even had me tricked (harr harr you'll get it in a second) it is Really That Much Worse. but holy shit was it good. i walked away satisfied ngl.

your choices have SOLID weight. there's consequences, good AND bad. i got minrathous blighted, ruled over by venatori, and the leader of the shadow dragons ultimately died because of my decisions. i made those at the beginning and throughout the game. he died at the end. DAVRIN died because i didn't expect what i was saying to have that much weight. i thought i was in the clear. he had hero status. well turns out, your choices can still get your companions killed even if you do everything right. i fucking love him. he shouldn't have made that sacrifice just because i told him to do everything it takes once.

the inquisitor, morrigan and dorian being there, surprisingly. there's also negatives to this though, see below.

speaking of companions dying and the inquisitor playing a bigger role: the final quest feels like me2's suicide mission. i was blown away by it and the fact that i got to see the results of all my efforts playing out in front of me.

bioware are NOT trying to redeem solas. they love him as a character yes, but i wasn't forced to see any good in him. he betrays you. he fucked my rook over twice. he fucked him over right back, for good this time (the veil wasn't torn down, i anchored it by binding him to it, he's doomed to uphold it). but solas really lives up to his name as the trickster elven god. rip to all the people who grew really attached to him over the years.

varric died. if you like him that's probably as hard reading it as it was watching it. varric died and the game lies about it until the very end. when the realisation hits, it hurts. but in the very best way.

the amount of care they put into gender expression and trans identities this time around. (i'll add onto this with negative points as well too).

rook feels very much ingrained in the world of thedas. he doesn't ask questions that expose the player to lore through dialogue as if he's stepped foot into thedas for the first time. those conversations feel very solid and good. i hope other faction players got as much joy out of this as i did.

and the things i didn't like and boy there's a lot unfortunately

the music. let's just get that out of the way holy shit. it doesn't feel like it belongs in this universe. it gets so incredibly sci-fi-y at times you'd think it's taken straight from mass effect andromeda. there's not a single song unique to veilguard that i really enjoyed. it broke my immersion, real bad. hearing a busker play the tavern songs from inquisition on a lute right after i killed some venatori with wobbly bass songs playing in the background is just odd. weird tonal shift. don't like it. it's made for people who like flashy light-weight cinema.

tevinter nights is required reading. the podcasts are required listening exercises. the game is so fast paced, especially at the start, that there's no time to introduce you to characters and how much weight their names carry in-game. i would not have known who half these people are if i hadn't skimmed over tevinter nights. i'd care even less about them than i already did. there is no time to get properly attached to them. people will act as if you're talking to a legend personified and you'll be thinking man goddamn which chapter of tevinter night were they in again and what did they do???

there's a weird mismatch with the animations. you'll have beautifully fluid ones, like emmrich casting spells. and then you'll have rook's face animating in the most unnatural manner that's sorta reminiscent of mass effect andromeda's "my face is tired" addison, when their emotions SHOULD be landing with the player rn instead.

i'm not vibing with the art style. sometimes it works. most of the time it doesn't. at points i felt like i was watching tangled.

that also brings me to some of the dialogue. same issue. i am watching frozen. i am watching tangled. someone on the writer's team really likes the adorkable trope. bellara is its victim.

for all the talk about identity, bioware sure doesn't like theirs. the grey warden armor got a redesign again and it just makes them look like a generic army. i hate it lol

in general, i don't like the armor design. the wardrobe/appearances system is fine, but it's just not helping if all the armors are just... kinda bland or downight bad looking? and don't get me started on the lords of fortune armor. that is orientalism personified.

the world states should have been carried over, full stop. i know they said they didn't because they want to separate what happens in the north from what happens in the south, which... i could have lived with that. but the inquisitor sends you letters that keep you up to date on... the south of thedas. you learn that there's a blight again, that people are standing strong but it's difficult, denerim's fallen, the rulers are taking care of it, orlais is fighting and they're successful for a while, etc etc. what's good bioware. i thought we don't care about the south this time around. why are you feeding me so much boring generic information. if you're not gonna show any of it and just write letters, then carrying the world state over should not have been an issue. i have a game dev background. those few lines of code would not have broken your budget or pushed your engine's limits. fuck right off.

this gripe of mine carries over to all the cameos. as a lord of fortune you have to deal with isabela a lot. it's fun. i missed her. you get to go drinking with her and taash and bellara! also my hawke romanced her. she's not mentioned once. they had the opportunity to put a sentence or two about her in there with not a lot of effort, trust me.

when varric dies, all she has is a single line about it. for gold, for fortune, for varric. she only says it if you interact with her on your way to the final push. that's not mandatory.

morrigan is there. kieran isn't. the old god soul that mythal and then solas absorbed? who cares at this point, the gods are dead now and solas is locked away for eternity. i suppose? why is morrigan there. she feels unneeded. i wish they'd just left her down south, at least that way i wouldn't have had to witness her god awful redesign.

dorian at least feels as if he belongs in this story. the shadow dragons are a crucial part to protecting minrathous. he's also weirdly underutilised. isabela and morrigan had more lines than him in my playthrough.

on the topic of romance: bro that was underwhelming. no, genuinely. you know when romance picked up a bit? after the point of no return. i heard maybe two lines of companion banter about it before that. maybe i missed something which i honestly doubt, but romance did not play much of a role in lucanis's storyline. i saved his grandmother as he wished me to (and if you read tevinter nights you know she was rather abusive and their relationship not the healthiest) and told him to focus on his family. a reunified family my rook wasn't even introduced to as a partner at the end of all that.

really, do not buy this game if you're only in it for the romances. others might be better, lucanis's basically gave me nothing. except for an outing (the second coffee date i had with him, it was getting repetitive) all of it played out once i committed to the final quest. the sex scene was a fade to black. annoyingly right after davrin died. if you're looking for well paced and good spice, pick up something else. the sweet talk and the final goodbye were nice though.

for all the good the ever-presence of gender identity does, it is brought up in such a disruptive manner too. it doesn't even play out naturally if you CHOOSE the lines that are meant to be said. hearing the words trans and non-binary in this setting doesn't feel right, and i'm saying this as a trans guy. i think it could have been handled more gracefully. the amount of times my rook went "i'm a MAN" as if he's about to start drumming on his chest and roaring any second now got super nerve-grating. "i'm so glad you're into me... the me who is trans. remember?" just. tell me one trans person who'd talk like that to a person they've grown close with and are trying to romance. this game doesn't handle sexuality well, so all this hey my body might not look like the way you're expecting it to look talk amounts to nothing anyway. i feel about this the way i feel about krem: this is partial exposition to trans experiences... packaged up for cis consumption. the ONLY exception to that is interacting with taash. holy shit was all of that heartwarming and bro did it feel good and natural to talk to them about theirs and rook's gender.

rivain and nevarra are new locations added by veilguard. they're also incredibly underwhelming, small and constricted maps. rivain is a coastline with a few ruins. the hall of valor is a partial ruin nestled into a cave on a beach, with a fighting pit. isabela is there in her skimpy outfit commentating your pit fights. that's it. i'm sorry if you were looking for a bustling pirate cove or whatever. you're not gonna get it. the nevarran crypts btw are a long ass dungeon crawl. that's it.

speaking of maps. i thought people were being dramatic when they said you're gonna be fighting the same enemies on them again and again. i thought they were figure of speeching it. they're not. you WILL fight the same amount of enemies. in the same spot. every time you reload the map. best to stay on a map and clear out the enemies and do as much questing on that map as you can before leaving, because you WILL have to do it all over again once you return.

the three choices i made for my inquisitor didn't matter lol she didn't have to face solas and therefore couldn't stop him at any cost as she had sworn (maybe because my rook tricked solas into binding himself to the veil, there was also an option to fight him. would she have stepped in? who knows). blackwall wasn't mentioned. and either her using a small amount of her forces in the final fight was the reason the civilians of minrathous fared so well..... or it just didn't matter. ultimately i think she had very little impact on anything